Question :
1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven’t eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?
2. A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But 5 minutes later they both go out and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be ?
Answers : Please highlight in block.
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Answers :
1. The third room. Lions that haven’t eaten in three years are dead. That one was easy, right?
2. The woman was a photographer. She shot a picture of her husband, developed it, and hung it up to dry.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
DOST BADALTE NAHI.....
Result agar achha ho:
Teacher: Hoshiyar bacha hai.
Maa: Bhagwan ki kripa hai.
Papa: Beta kiska hai.
DOST-Chal daaru peetey hain.
Result agar bura ho:
Teacher: Padhai mein dhyan hi nahi.
Maa: Aag lage is mobile mein.
Papa: Laad pyar ne bigaad diya.
Dost-Chal daaru peetey hain.
B'day par:-
Maa: Jug jug jiye mera beta.
Papa: Hamesha aage badho.
DOST-Chal daaru peetey hain.
Love mein fail hone par:-
Maa: Beta bhul ja usko.
Papa: Mard ban.
DOST: CHAL DAARU PEETEY HAIN YAAR.
MORAL OF STORY - Duniya badal jati hai but DOST kabhi nahi
badalte..?,.?..? CHAL DARU PITE HAIN YAAR.
Teacher: Hoshiyar bacha hai.
Maa: Bhagwan ki kripa hai.
Papa: Beta kiska hai.
DOST-Chal daaru peetey hain.
Result agar bura ho:
Teacher: Padhai mein dhyan hi nahi.
Maa: Aag lage is mobile mein.
Papa: Laad pyar ne bigaad diya.
Dost-Chal daaru peetey hain.
B'day par:-
Maa: Jug jug jiye mera beta.
Papa: Hamesha aage badho.
DOST-Chal daaru peetey hain.
Love mein fail hone par:-
Maa: Beta bhul ja usko.
Papa: Mard ban.
DOST: CHAL DAARU PEETEY HAIN YAAR.
MORAL OF STORY - Duniya badal jati hai but DOST kabhi nahi
badalte..?,.?..? CHAL DARU PITE HAIN YAAR.
Tips for filling petrol and diesel
2 tips for filling petrol and diesel:-
Only buy or fill up your car or bike during early morning, when the ground temperature is still cold. Remember that all service stations have their storage tanks underground. . The colder the ground, the more dense the fuel. When it gets warmer, petrol expands. So, buying in the afternoon or in the evening, your litre is not exactly a litre. In the petroleum business, the specific gravity and the temperature play an important role. 1 degree rise in temperature is a big deal for this business. But the service stations do not have temperature compensation at the pumps.
Another most important tip is to fill up when your tank is HALF FULL. The reason for this is, the more fuel you have in your tank the less is the air occupying its empty space. Petrol evaporates faster than you can imagine.
DO SHARE THESE TIPS WITH OTHERS - IT IS IMPORTANT FOR AS MANY PEOPLE TO KNOW ABOUT THIS, ESPECIALLY IN THE WAKE OF RISING PETROL PRICES.
Save Resources...Save Planet !!
Only buy or fill up your car or bike during early morning, when the ground temperature is still cold. Remember that all service stations have their storage tanks underground. . The colder the ground, the more dense the fuel. When it gets warmer, petrol expands. So, buying in the afternoon or in the evening, your litre is not exactly a litre. In the petroleum business, the specific gravity and the temperature play an important role. 1 degree rise in temperature is a big deal for this business. But the service stations do not have temperature compensation at the pumps.
Another most important tip is to fill up when your tank is HALF FULL. The reason for this is, the more fuel you have in your tank the less is the air occupying its empty space. Petrol evaporates faster than you can imagine.
DO SHARE THESE TIPS WITH OTHERS - IT IS IMPORTANT FOR AS MANY PEOPLE TO KNOW ABOUT THIS, ESPECIALLY IN THE WAKE OF RISING PETROL PRICES.
Save Resources...Save Planet !!
The 4 Missing Strategic Sourcing Goals - Purchasing Tips!!!!. Just for your Knowledge
What Are Your Strategic Sourcing Goals?
Ask anyone in procurement "What is the goal of strategic sourcing?" and their reply is likely to include the phrase "to save money." And that is commonly the #1 goal of strategic sourcing. But it's problematic when procurement departments treat it as the only goal.
For sourcing to be truly strategic, it must accomplish more than just saving money. It must bring value to the organization in many other ways. Here are four goals commonly missing from strategic sourcing initiatives:
Goal #2: To reduce risk. The international news constantly reminds us that natural disasters, political upheavals, and other events make doing business exclusively in certain parts of the world a risky approach. Strategic sourcing should enable you to sustain continuity of supply in the face of unexpected disruption to the operations of one or more suppliers.
Goal #3: To improve supplier performance. Reducing the unit price you pay on purchase orders is nice, but it is meaningless if your organization has to deal with frequent late deliveries, an unacceptable number of quality defects, and poor supplier service. Strategic sourcing is only truly successful when you achieve both cost reduction and an improvement in supplier performance.
Goal #4: To bring in innovations from the supply base.
In today's competitive business environment, organizations need a constant flow of innovative ideas in order to keep their competitors from stealing their market share. Suppliers can be a great source of innovative ideas and a good strategic sourcing process will ensure that the flow of such ideas is facilitated.
Goal #5: To support the organization's social responsibility goals. Today's organizations support diversity, environmental responsibility, and other philanthropic goals. Decisions made as part of strategic sourcing should consciously help move the organization towards those goals and not away from them.
So, as you can see, saving money is not THE goal of strategic sourcing. It is one of several important goals.
Ask anyone in procurement "What is the goal of strategic sourcing?" and their reply is likely to include the phrase "to save money." And that is commonly the #1 goal of strategic sourcing. But it's problematic when procurement departments treat it as the only goal.
For sourcing to be truly strategic, it must accomplish more than just saving money. It must bring value to the organization in many other ways. Here are four goals commonly missing from strategic sourcing initiatives:
Goal #2: To reduce risk. The international news constantly reminds us that natural disasters, political upheavals, and other events make doing business exclusively in certain parts of the world a risky approach. Strategic sourcing should enable you to sustain continuity of supply in the face of unexpected disruption to the operations of one or more suppliers.
Goal #3: To improve supplier performance. Reducing the unit price you pay on purchase orders is nice, but it is meaningless if your organization has to deal with frequent late deliveries, an unacceptable number of quality defects, and poor supplier service. Strategic sourcing is only truly successful when you achieve both cost reduction and an improvement in supplier performance.
Goal #4: To bring in innovations from the supply base.
In today's competitive business environment, organizations need a constant flow of innovative ideas in order to keep their competitors from stealing their market share. Suppliers can be a great source of innovative ideas and a good strategic sourcing process will ensure that the flow of such ideas is facilitated.
Goal #5: To support the organization's social responsibility goals. Today's organizations support diversity, environmental responsibility, and other philanthropic goals. Decisions made as part of strategic sourcing should consciously help move the organization towards those goals and not away from them.
So, as you can see, saving money is not THE goal of strategic sourcing. It is one of several important goals.
Army or Alcohol ???
Do you remember Major Sandeep Unnikrishnan, the Malayali army commando officer who sacrificed his life to save Mumbai from the terrorist attacks ? His bravery will remain unsurpassed.
The Kerala Govt., headed by Shri VS Achuthanandan awarded Rs. 3 lakhs to the family of Maj Sandeep Unnikrishnan. The same govt., headed by the same Chief Minister, donated Rs.5 lakhs to the victims of the recent Malappuram Liquor tragedy.
Now you decide - what should a youngster do??...To join Army & die for the Nation ?? ....
or die by consuming illicit liquor ???
I think the bottommost line is a much better option !!!!!!!!
The Kerala Govt., headed by Shri VS Achuthanandan awarded Rs. 3 lakhs to the family of Maj Sandeep Unnikrishnan. The same govt., headed by the same Chief Minister, donated Rs.5 lakhs to the victims of the recent Malappuram Liquor tragedy.
Now you decide - what should a youngster do??...To join Army & die for the Nation ?? ....
or die by consuming illicit liquor ???
I think the bottommost line is a much better option !!!!!!!!
Free time reading
Why do we sometimes write 'etc' at the end in the exam?
bcoz it means...
E-End of
T-thinking
C-capacity.
-----------------------------------------
How to Create d Biggest Doubt in ur Wife's Mind 4 u?
?
?
?
?
?
Just Suddenly send her SMS Saying..
"I Luv u too"
.
.
GAME OVER.!
-----------------------------------------
When do you knw ur in love?
Ans. When you start searching for the cheapest mobile plan
-----------------------------------------
Wht is the Diff b/w
Young Age & Old Age?
*
Simple..
In Young Age
Phone Is Full Of Darlings Numbers..
In Old Age
Its Full of Doctors Numbers..!-
-----------------------------------------
"Why is Facebook such a hit?
It works on the principle that-
'People are more interested in others life than their own-!
-----------------------------------------
A Ques Asked In A Talent Test:
If You Are Married To 1 Of The Twin Sisters, How wud You Recognize Your WIFE?
The Best Answer
- Why d Hell Should I recognise?
-----------------------------------------
V Pronounce 22 as TwentyTwo, 33 as Thirty Three,
44 as FortyFour,
55 as FiftyFive, Why not 11 as OnetyOne?
Doubt By last bench asociation...
-----------------------------------------
What is the diff.between"GHAZAL" &"LECTURE"?Every word spoken by the girlfriend is "GHAZAL"andEvery word spoken by wife is "LECTURE"
-----------------------------------------
Wats d diff btwn Pongal n idly?think.think..think...U ll get a holiday for pongal but not for idly.
----------------------------------------
What will be the girl's name born on 1st of APRIL? Guess Guess Guess Guess "FOOLAN DEVI..
-----------------------------------------
Why does d bride & groom xchange garlands at d time of wedding..... B'coz they say each affectionately that : "DARLING NOW U R DEAD"...........
-----------------------------------------
What is the height of confusion? Two earth worms Playing HIDE AND SEEK in a Plate full of noodles.
-----------------------------------------
Wat is d Biggest Benefit of having a crush in d same college where u study ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
100% Attendence... :-P
-----------------------------------------
QUES - Where can u see mangoes? On mango trees? NO.At fruit shop? WRONG AGAIN....Fir kaha?
ANS - Jaha jaha women go,piche piche Man(goes).
-----------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------
Teacher: What Is The Differnce HIMAMI
&
SUNAMI ?
Tintu: HIMAMI is Face Wash,
SUNAMI is Total Wash.!
-----------------------------------------
Difference between Friend & Wife
U can Tell ur Friend
U r my Best Friend
But
Do u have courage tell to ur Wife
U r my Best Wife?
-----------------------------------------
bcoz it means...
E-End of
T-thinking
C-capacity.
-----------------------------------------
How to Create d Biggest Doubt in ur Wife's Mind 4 u?
?
?
?
?
?
Just Suddenly send her SMS Saying..
"I Luv u too"
.
.
GAME OVER.!
-----------------------------------------
When do you knw ur in love?
Ans. When you start searching for the cheapest mobile plan
-----------------------------------------
Wht is the Diff b/w
Young Age & Old Age?
*
Simple..
In Young Age
Phone Is Full Of Darlings Numbers..
In Old Age
Its Full of Doctors Numbers..!-
-----------------------------------------
"Why is Facebook such a hit?
It works on the principle that-
'People are more interested in others life than their own-!
-----------------------------------------
A Ques Asked In A Talent Test:
If You Are Married To 1 Of The Twin Sisters, How wud You Recognize Your WIFE?
The Best Answer
- Why d Hell Should I recognise?
-----------------------------------------
V Pronounce 22 as TwentyTwo, 33 as Thirty Three,
44 as FortyFour,
55 as FiftyFive, Why not 11 as OnetyOne?
Doubt By last bench asociation...
-----------------------------------------
What is the diff.between"GHAZAL" &"LECTURE"?Every word spoken by the girlfriend is "GHAZAL"andEvery word spoken by wife is "LECTURE"
-----------------------------------------
Wats d diff btwn Pongal n idly?think.think..think...U ll get a holiday for pongal but not for idly.
----------------------------------------
What will be the girl's name born on 1st of APRIL? Guess Guess Guess Guess "FOOLAN DEVI..
-----------------------------------------
Why does d bride & groom xchange garlands at d time of wedding..... B'coz they say each affectionately that : "DARLING NOW U R DEAD"...........
-----------------------------------------
What is the height of confusion? Two earth worms Playing HIDE AND SEEK in a Plate full of noodles.
-----------------------------------------
Wat is d Biggest Benefit of having a crush in d same college where u study ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
100% Attendence... :-P
-----------------------------------------
QUES - Where can u see mangoes? On mango trees? NO.At fruit shop? WRONG AGAIN....Fir kaha?
ANS - Jaha jaha women go,piche piche Man(goes).
-----------------------------------------
-----------------------------------------
Teacher: What Is The Differnce HIMAMI
&
SUNAMI ?
Tintu: HIMAMI is Face Wash,
SUNAMI is Total Wash.!
-----------------------------------------
Difference between Friend & Wife
U can Tell ur Friend
U r my Best Friend
But
Do u have courage tell to ur Wife
U r my Best Wife?
-----------------------------------------
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